Three-year-old Mabel watches as her mother leaves the classroom. The child starts to cry. Her classmate, Katie, sees that she is upset that her mother is leaving for work. Little Katie walks over, strokes her arm, and asks if she wants to play. Katie has shown compassion, understanding, and a desire to help her friend. This is a classic display of how emotional intelligence develops in young children.

The spotlight on Emotional Intelligence, or what is more commonly known as the Emotional Quotient (EQ), is a recent one. The intelligence quotient, or IQ, was long thought and seen as the key to how well a person succeeds in life. It has only been in the past 10 years that researchers realised that IQ is not the only predictor of a person's success. We have turned our attention to emotional intelligence as another important factor. The emotional abilities of an individual are now seen as critical “life skills” that can make the difference in how well one relates to others, and eventually how the individual succeeds in life.

All of us are wired to express and experience emotions. It is all too easy sometimes to forget that young children, just like adults, are capable of feeling and responding to a variety of emotions. Nurturing good emotional intelligence in young children is therefore an important part of early childhood development.

Children need to be nurtured in at least five types of skills in order to develop good emotional intelligence:

• Self-awareness
  This refers to the ability to understand and be aware of their feelings and moods. This awareness helps children to keep an eye on their thoughts and emotions so they can understand why they feel a particular way.
• Managing emotions
  This helps them to display their emotions in ways that are appropriate in a social setting. It helps them to control anger, sadness and fear
• Motivation
  This helps them to use their emotions to achieve their goals. For example, children who are motivated are able to hold back their impulses and delay gratification in order to reach their desired goals.
• Empathy
  Instead of merely feeling sorry for someone, empathy is the ability to understand how another feels. It is feeling like "walking in someone else's shoes".
• Social skills
  Children with social skills are able to deal with others in a social situation. This is the ability to carry on a conversation and deal with the emotions of others.

Watch out for next month's article where you can learn more on how to nurture emotional intelligence in young children.

Source:
Brazelton, T. Berry & Greenspan, S. (2001). The Irreducible Needs of Children: What Every Child Must Have to Grow, Learn, and Flourish. Perseus Publishing.